This the Hulkster's best movie.
So, on Saturday, Steve, Steve’s son Jonathan, my son Joey and myself will watch all five Fast/Furious movies. I’m both excited and horrified at these events. As mindless action movies go, FF is probably the most cotton candy I can stomach. It’s a higher level than Transporter (in spite of what the curly haired ginger would say) and it’s got Vin Diesel, who I like (not like-like, just like).
It got me thinking though, other than the obvious (the most recent three Star Wars Turd Fergusons) is there a franchise that would literally kill me? I think the answer came to me while reading a wrestling article. If I watched, back-to-back-to-back-to… all of the movies starring professional wrestlers, I’d die. You’d have Princess Bride with Andre the Giant, so that’s good, but then it really falls off a cliff. The Rock movies would be slightly bareable, especially compared to any film starring Hulk Hogan. But, then you’d get into films starring guys like John Cena, straight to DVD movies starring Sting. Rowdy Roddy Piper’s opus “The Live” would seem like Citizen Kane compared to…every other movie starring Rowdy Roddy. Honestly, just watching movies with Hulk Hogan in them would ruin me, but throw in things with John Cena, Blade Trinity with Triple H and so forth and I would literally die.
I think watching certain cartoon marathons (Care Bears) might kill me, or at least put me in the hospital. But really, a wrestling movie marathon would just put me out of my misery.
Don’t forget “Hunt to Kill” starring Steve Austin. That movie almost ended me by itself.